Trashy Makeover #1

I'm a sucker for trash.

Call it my trailer park roots or my projected affection for wounded animals, whatever. I saw a chair on the street the other day and forced myself to walk past it. As a bargain, I promised that if it was still there when I came back after body pump class an hour and a half later, then it was a sign.

Guess what. It was still there.

When I see an old rotting piece of furniture on the street, I think about all those times I laid in the grass under the late summer sun and promised our cat Whiskers that I'd always take care of her, no matter how independent she grew or how many times she ran off and got herself knocked up.

I can't walk away.

Everybody hurts.

Let me ask you a couple of hypotheticals:

1. If you saw a scruffy, three-legged puppy wandering aimlessly through the crosswalk, would you drop your ice cream cone, run to it, arms wailing in the air, screaming, "Mama, I'll save you!!"
2. If you walked into a guitar shop and saw a teeny faced mullet in a Black Crowes t-shirt playing "Everybody Hurts" into the empty corner, would you walk over quietly, so as not to spook, and say, "Oh honey. Can you not do that?"

If you hypothetically answered yes to either of these, then you know what I'm talking about. It's our lot.

Before Glamour Shots:

After Glamour Shots:

Who's hurting now?

DIY: Easy No-Zipper Pillows

This is how it usually goes:
Ooooh! I love this fabric. Well... I'll just get a yard, that's all. Just enough for a pillow, no harm here! Oh, and maybe just a yard of this one, too. And some contrasting fabric, that's all. Just a yard of this, a yard of this one and this one, too. See, it's not that much and out of all of this, we'll have all new pillows.

Pillows! Pillows for every room in the house new PILLOWS! Pillows Pillows Pillows I love PILLOWS! I'll sew them all!

Cut to:
Piles and piles and boxes and closets filled with Just A Yard Of This and Just A Yard Of That. And nary a pillow to be found.

Wanna know why? I flippin' hate sewing zippers. Hate 'em like the day is long. I know, it's not that hard, but it's literally the only thing that keeps me from sewing all those pillows. I just hate it.


So, be still my beating heart, I came across this post for envelope-back pillows. Duh! How many times have I seen these and not thought to do it myself!

I have been staring at my cute Pink Pig fabric for about a year, it taunting me day by day by day. 

Soooooome Pig!! It would say. 

Finally yesterday I took care of business and made my Pink Pig Pillow.

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Sewing 101: Envelope Back Pillows

You'll Need:

Pillow form - I used a 21" pillow, so the measurements below are based on that.
Measuring tape or large ruler
Straight edge - you can use the large ruler or anything else that has a straight edge.
Rotary cutter or scissors
Fabric pencil
Sewing machine & thread
3 Pieces of fabric cut to the measurements below - you can use a contrasting fabric on the back.
        *Note: If you have a closet full of fabric, ahem, you can dig around and piece together scraps that are the
         measurements needed. No need to buy more.
        **Second Note: Use any old fabric you have that measures up - t-shirts, old curtains, throws, skirts, etc.

1. Measure and cut 3 pieces of fabric based on the size of your pillow. Use contrasting fabric on the back pieces if you want. You can also "railroad" the same fabric to make contrast if you don't have two fabrics. Simply turn the fabric sideways and cut your back pieces across the pattern. That's what I did.
        For my 21" Pillow:
            - Front piece = 22" x 22"
            - One back piece = 11.5" x 22"
            - Second back piece = 14.5" x 22"

2. Back pieces:  Press a hem 1/2" on one edge of each piece, then fold and press another 1/2".

Pin the hems.

3.  Sew the pinned hems.

4.  Overlap the two back pieces about 2", making sure that the total width equals 22" once overlapped.

5.  Pin & sew the overlap.

6.  Lay the front and back pieces on top of each other with the patterns facing each other.

7.  Pin the pieces and sew around all four sides with at least a 1/2" hem, double locking the corners. You can do a 1" hem or more if you want the pillow to be tighter.

8. Trim the corners and turn it right side in. Use a chopstick or bone folder to poke out the corners.

9.  Put a pillow in it!

10.  Take pictures and stare at it for at least 7 minutes.

Sooooooooome Pig!!

DIY: Easy Blackout Curtains

I had taken to nightly whining fits. 10pm. 11pm. 2am. 6am.

There's a lampost right outside our bedroom window that's on all night, so it's not just the morning sun that pokes through our curtains and slaps me like I'd been dancing on bar tops all night long, when I know for certain that I had not been. I'm not 30 anymore.

So what's a girl to do with her cute, store bought, thinly veiled curtains?

Source: West Elm Ikat Ogee Linen Curtains

You dream of hotels, that's what you do! Like the one you stayed in the night you got engaged. 

Bar dancing hussy turns into bed jumping monkey
at the stroke of a sapphire.

I digress.

Hotels get it right every time. With their thick, fluffy duvets, remote control tv's, bathrooms 3 feet from the bed and, my personal favorite, curtains so dark that you could live there for 10 days and forget that the earth revolves around the sun.

We're staying here when we go to London next month. 
It's going to be so dark!!!
Source: Base2Stay.com

So back to the problem at hand: my super thin curtains and my lazy solution for night fits. This is the easiest sewing project you'll ever do, I promise. I did this yesterday in about an hour, and boy did I SLEEP last night!

The most awesome thing about blackout fabric is that it cuts like butter and doesn't need to be hemmed!

1.  First buy your curtains.

These are nice.
Source: Urban Outfitters 

You could make your own, which I've done plenty of in my lifetime. But sometimes the thought of measuring, cutting, folding, pressing, pinning and hemming 36 yards in circumference is a little too much for a Tuesday, so you buy them readymade.

2.  Get some blackout fabric. I usually use white or cream, depending on the fabric color.

3. Roll out the blackout fabric and lay your curtain on top of it. Trim all around the edges just outside the curtain. Cut it like you cut wrapping paper. Wheeee!

**Save yourself some cutting by scooting the curtain over to one side of the b.o. fabric and making the top of the curtain flush with the top edge.

Yes, those are my haircutting shears. 

4.  Sew it! And guess what, you don't even need to pin it. I'm a renegade, so I don't play by no stinkin' rules. If you have a steady hand and focused eye, you can just hold the fabrics in place as you feed them through the machine.

Sew all around the edges - you can skip the bottoms like I did.

5.  At the top of your curtain, sew the b.o. fabric just below the panel where the rod goes. I just followed along the existing seam. Trim off the excess.

And voila! You have blackout curtains!!

Ginger couldn't be bothered with celebrating my handiwork.

Sleep well, my friends.